Skip to main content

The husband does a book review: The Dude’s Guide to Marriage

My husband, Gil, recently read a good book he would highly recommend to other husbands...or those wishing to become a husband. Darrin and Amie Patrick co-wrote this fun book, an easy-to-read, yet encouraging guide to helping husbands develop skills to love his wife well. 



I can tell when Gil likes a book. He moves it from room to room in our house- from the bedroom, to the living room, to the dining room- where ever he will sit for a few minutes and read a few pages. Also, he reads me quotes he appreciates from the book. 

Of all the quotes from the book that seemed to really cause us to think, the best one is: ”Community is diverse, disturbing, and challenging, unlike affinity, which is bland, reinforcing and safe.” (58)

We speak a lot about community in our own lives and ministry. We get the importance of having a strong community around ourselves, but using the terms “diverse, disturbing and challenging” brought true community into new light for me. It’s so easy to keep ourselves surrounded by others like us- therefore creating a bland and safe space. But true community is often in-your-face kind of relationships, whether because of extreme differences among the culture of the people involved or because the relationships as deep enough to call each other out in places where growth is needed. The Patricks urge men to involve themselves in true community- I’d say that community is necessary for everyone. 
Gil also liked Darrin’s suggestions of ways to celebrate the Sabbath in chapter 6- Rest, a rested husband is a peaceful husband. I’ll keep those tips a secret for those that read the book- it’s good stuff though. And, since I am a wife to a husband that needs rest, I find this chapter extra helpful because I can learn a few ways to make my husband’s days off even better. 

Go grab yourself, your spouse and someone else a copy of this quick-to-read book. It’ll be like hanging out with a trusted friend for a little while. 

Thank you BookLook for providing me with a free copy of this book to review. It was fun having Gil’s input on one of my reviews! Our opinions are our own. 


Lindsay

Comments

  1. I like that description of community. Although its not anything I could have put into words, that really is more of the community we are involved in. Eternity is just too close to play it safe and bland. It IS challenging but...why shouldn't it be? Never, not once did Jesus promise easy. Thanks for sharing.

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

This Rocking Chair

While pregnant with my first child, my sweet in-laws bought me a rocking chair for the nursery. I picked this one because it was tall and strong. It had the perfect height arm rests for my tallness and I could rest my head back on it without breaking my neck. It also came from my favorite Amish furniture store in my hometown. It’s solid oak. Or is it solid cherry? I can’t remember, but it is solid something. 
This rocking chair is the place that I sat and nursed my babies every night. I remember watching countless sunrises or waking up from a sore neck after falling asleep holding one of them. I dealt with big feelings while sitting in that chair. I wrestled with loneliness, feeling like I was the only person in the whole planet awake, again. I sat in that chair and dug through emotions that come with pure exhaustion.I spent so much time in that chair that I learned the perfect launch sequence to somehow get myself to a standing position with a sleeping baby and carefully put her back …

The most embarrassing thing I have ever googled

I have recently decided that not only do I not like to cook or do dishes, I also have started to dislike grocery shopping. My poor family. This comes at a rather inopportune time also, since we are trying to continue down the path of eating healthy. However, avocados and protein balls don’t come in packages ready to eat, nor do they arrive on my doorstep prepared. This food we all want to eat just seems to require attention I’d rather give to other things and my personal assistant hasn’t show up yet. 
However, I think I have hit an all time low. I googled the most embarrassing thing this afternoon. You see, there wasn’t much left in the fridge or freezer because I avoid grocery shopping. But, being the good mom I am, I couldn’t let the kids go hungry. So I looked at the random foods we did have and asked google for help. 
Did you know there are about four dozen websites that give you ideas on what to do with frozen chicken nuggets? Now you do. And now I know 11 different ways to use the…

Standing

I’ve been reading Strong and Weak by Andy Crouch with my Facebook reading group over the last few weeks. He defines “flourishing” differently that I would have initially, but after his explanation, I agree with him. My paraphrase of his definition is doing the thing that requires risk and all of you- and doing it with abandon. It doesn’t really matter if you succeed from the perspective of the onlookers, it doesn’t matter if you’re the best at it, it doesn’t matter if you entirely fulfill your goal. It’s the heart behind what you do, it’s the motivator for why you do what you do. 
I kept comparing his definition of flourishing to parenting initially, as did some of my friends who are also reading the book. Parenting is tough. It is a daily sacrifice and servanthood to little people who may or may not ever know. It’s a stretching past limits I previously thought I couldn’t reach. It’s relying on Jesus in a way I never knew...because I simply want to do it better than I’ve seen it done b…